As I watched SNL spoof “Signalgate” in last week’s cold open, I was thinking about a mythological dragon. In ancient times, this dragon was said to devour the Sun or the Moon during an eclipse. This idea is incorporated in the astrology of today. The North Node (the point in a chart where eclipses happen) is symbolized by a dragon’s head. The South Node (the point exactly opposite and where eclipses also happen) is the tail of the dragon. The eclipse on March 13/14th occurred within four degrees of this beastly tail where all is leaked and released — embarrassingly so. I may have been watching Bowen Yang do convincing JD Vance à-la-Mean Girls, but I was ruminating on how this snafu involving the highest officials in the land would have the ancients simply saying, “I told you so.”

The mess, as we now know, began on March 11th, when National Security Advisor Mike Waltz added Editor-in-Chief of The Atlantic, Jeffrey Goldberg, to a group on Signal titled, “Houthi Small Group P.C.” Signal is an end-to-end encrypted text messaging platform, but it’s open to anyone — government official or aspiring hacker. The addition of a prominent political journalist was a blunder for sure but one that none of the 20 or so officials on that group had clocked. Neptune, the planet of illusion, delusion, and fog was at the 29th degree of Pisces. The last degree of a sign is a weary spot for any planet, but especially the one that is already prone to blur facts and swap contacts. At this last degree of Pisces, confusion abounds, and unseen bloopers hide in the fog. 

Goldberg thought it had to be a hoax, a trap. There was no way that CIA Director John Ratcliffe had just given the name of a never-publicly-disclosed CIA operative over Signal. There was no way that the Vice President and Secretary of Defense, among others, were debating the pros and cons of a major military operation against Yemen. Goldberg continued to watch the chat as the top and highest officials in DC exchanged strategy because what if it was real? Neptune was with the North Node, therefore heightening the uncertainty and disbelief. 

The chart for the March 14th Virgo eclipse (when set for DC) had the Full Moon with the dragon’s tail in the 10th House of publicity and prominence. Jupiter, the planet that magnifies and makes large seemingly small matters, was rising in Gemini. The chart ruler was Mercury, the communicator, in full trickster mode as it prepared to station retrograde. Mercury was also in Aries, the sign of war. Whatever was about to be leaked would be very, very loud.

The day after the eclipse, Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth, sent the text. The one that relayed tactical, logistical war plans about impending air strikes on Yemen. It had the times, the targets, and the sign-off, “God bless our warriors,” that sounded too accurate to not be legit. This was on March 15th at 11:44 am ET, and the strikes were set to begin within two hours. Goldberg decided to watch the news. Sure enough, the bombs were falling in Yemen. It was indeed real. A stunning security breach involving the people closest to the president had happened, and Goldberg was on the group chat. 

This particular eclipse season of March 2025 was ruled by Mercury, the messenger, and Mars, the warrior. And that’s written on the wall, as they say. Mercury rules the sign of Virgo, where details, analysis, and specificities are mission-critical. By the time Jeffrey was included on the Signal group chat, Mercury was in a state, completely stressed and unmoisturized, about to station retrograde in the cardinal fire sign. It was also in aversion to the sign of Virgo (traditional speak for it didn’t form a major aspect and thus couldn’t see the sign) where it was in no place to assist us in the eclipse. The news broke on March 24th — between the two eclipses — when Goldberg published the article titled, “The Trump Administration Accidentally Texted Me Its War Plans: … I didn’t think it could be real.” Eclipses at the dragon’s tail de-classify the classified, spill secrets, and reveal what had previously been lurking in the shadows. 

The Aries solar eclipse on March 29th was ruled by Mars, the planet of warriors and leaders, and this one revealed a stain on leadership. Trump’s closest advisors gathered ranks after the news broke. Just two days after The Atlantic article went viral, the House Intelligence Committee held public hearings with billboards showing the text. The usual Trump strategy of “blame and ridicule the journalist” wasn't working. Veterans and the military felt betrayed. Cringe and global embarrassment permeated. Goldberg told his account on The Daily podcast. We were all incredulous at the people at the top. In ancient times, ancient Mesopotamian cultures believed that solar eclipses didn’t bode well for the ruler. They performed a “substitution of king” ritual, wherein an unfortunate commoner was chosen to sit on the throne at the time of a solar eclipse, only to be sacrificially killed. The ruler would then resume his place on the throne once the baleful eclipse rays had subsided. In today’s world, we may not go to such extremes, but for a time, it seemed that Michael Waltz or Pete Hegseth would take the fall for the leak. The “king’s” advisors may still all have their jobs, but they’ve certainly toppled from whatever grace they had. A few days ago, the matter was simply declared closed as the White House attempted to go back to doing the Military Industrial Complex as usual behind closed doors.

Yet, that’s the thing about eclipses. They change the game at the most critical level. In the astrology of world events, eclipses have, more often than not, played a crucial role in altering the course of history. Humans have long looked at eclipses as bad omens and as ushers of calamity. In modern times, when astrology is more accessible than ever, we get to ask: calamitous for whom? Because if it means that the ineptitude, emoji celebrations of war, and laziness among our leadership are revealed to the public, then I’m here for it. I’ll thank the dragon.